Gender differences in the experience of heterosexual intercourse.

ABSTRACT: This paper describes the development and testing of a self-report scale delineating the components of the experience of heterosexual intercourse of both men and women. In a preliminary study, 70 men freely expressed the feelings, thoughts, and motives involved in the experience of heterosexual intercourse. A content analysis revealed that the components of the experience of heterosexual intercourse found in the men's sample are very similar to those found in a women's sample in a previous study (Birnbaum, Glaubman, & Mikulincer, 2001). On this account, the Experience of Heterosexual Intercourse Scale (EHIS), which was used by Birnbaum and her colleagues, was administered to 181 women and 178 men. Overall, the results revealed that the experience of women was more centred on both the aversive and positive relational aspects of heterosexual intercourse than the experience of men. Findings are discussed in relation to sociobiological and social influence theories.

Key words: Heterosexual intercourse Experience of Heterosexual Intercourse Scale Gender differences

INTRODUCTION

Considerable research has demonstrated that men and women differ somewhat in attitudinal, physiological, and behavioural aspects of sexuality. Attitudes, behaviours, sensations, drives, emotions, and cognitions all constitute the experience of sexual intercourse. Yet there has been a paucity of research addressing the issue of gender differences in the subjective experience of sexual intercourse as a whole. Most research has either focused on gender differences in narrowly defined aspects of the sexual experience, such as discrete emotions and behaviours, or used a rather broader definition of sexuality, but limited itself to the first sexual intercourse experience. The current research attempts to construct a self-report scale tapping the emotional, cognitive, and motivational components of the experience of heterosexual intercourse of both men and women, and, then, to examine gender differences in these components.

Several theoretical perspectives can be used to explain how gender relates to sexuality, as well as to predict gender differences in the experience of heterosexual intercourse. For example, according to evolutionary psychology (e.g., Buss, 1998; Buss & Schmitt, 1993) and sociobiological approaches to human sexuality (e.g., Symons, 1979; Trivers, 1972), differences found today between men and women in sexual desires, attitudes, and behaviours are a result of having different requirements for successful reproduction (i.e., success in passing on one's genes to the next generations). These differences have evolved from asymmetry between the sexes in the minimum level of obligatory parental investment in each offspring.

Because of this asymmetry, short-term mating will comprise a larger proportion of the total mating efforts of men than of women (Buss, 1998; Buss & Schmitt, 1993). Moreover, both short-term and long-term mating success were dependent upon solving different problems faced by men and women in the course of human evolution. Men needed to identify and enter brief affairs with a large number of fertile women, and at the same time minimize commitment and investment in these women and their offspring in order to succeed in short-term mating. Conversely, women had to assess the quality of men's genes and to select men who would provide immediate resources and be potentially long-term mates. In the same manner, to effectively pursue a long-term mating strategy, each gender had to solve different adaptive problems. While men had to ensure certainty in paternity, women needed to identify men who would be willing and able to invest resources in them and in their offspring on a long-term basis. However, the sexes also confronted similar adaptive problems: the problem of identifying mate with good parenting skills who would be willing to form a committed relationship (Buss & Schmitt, 1993).

Although evolutionary theorists did not make direct predictions about the experience of sexual intercourse per se, they did predict gender differences in sexuality in those domains in which the sexes have faced different adaptive problems (e.g., Buss, 1998; Buss & Schmitt, 1993). For the reason that men and women had to cope mostly with different set of problems in order to succeed in both short term and long term mating, it might be suggested that differences in reproductive strategies might manifest themselves in the form of gender differences in the experience of sexual intercourse with both short-term and long-term partners. For example, women may use the sexual encounter as an assessment (or reassessment, in the case of an ongoing relationship) device to evaluate their partners' characteristics and value, as well as their intentions, earnestness, and ability to be committed to them, and to maintain a long-term relationship. Hence, women, as compared to men, are expected to place a greater emphasis on interpersonal aspects during sexual intercourse, and to be more attuned to cues implying their partner's intentions and characteristics.

While sociobiology and evolutionary psychology argue that differences between men and women mainly stem from different adaptive problems confronted by each gender in the human ancestral environment, various social influence (e.g., social learning, social role, and script) perspectives assert that gender differences in sexuality are molded by social forces, pressures, and scripts (e.g., DeLamater, 1987; Gagnon & Simon, 1973; Reiss, 1981). Putting these perspectives together, it is posited that differences between men and women in their orientation toward sexuality are shaped during one's socialization history by positive reinforcement for behaviours that are conforming to sociocultural norms and conventions, and punishments for behaviours deviating from these gender-role expectations. Hence, if women and men were similarly placed in the social structure and consequently had gone through the same socialization processes with their sexuality, they would have been expected to develop similar orientation toward sex (Eagly & Wood, 1999). Nevertheless, women and men rarely receive the same socialization about sexuality. To illustrate, men often receive more positive reinforcement for engaging in casual sex, expressing their sexual needs and focusing on physical pleasure and gratification, while women often receive more positive reinforcement for restricting their sexual expression to committed and affectionate relationships (e.g., DeLamater, 1987; Gagnon & Simon, 1973; Sprecher, McKinney, & Orbuch, 1987). Therefore, women and men are expected to exhibit different sexual desires, attitudes and behaviours, as well as to experience their sexuality differently.

In sum, both social influence and sociobiological perspectives are in agreement that women adopt a more emotional-interpersonal orientation to sexuality, whereas men develop a more recreational orientation toward their sexuality. Thus, it might be argued that this different sexual orientation is likely to be translated into differences between the sexes in the emotional, cognitive, and motivational aspects of the experience of sexual intercourse. More specifically, women are expected to be occupied with their romantic relationships during sexual intercourse and to experience the sexual intercourse as a reflection of the dyadic relationships as well as a sign of love, and other positive emotions their partner feels toward them. Men, on the other hand, are expected to emphasize the pleasure and satisfaction derived from the sexual act itself.

A review of research on gender differences in the sexual experience reveals a lack of systematic attempts aimed at describing and mapping the components of this experience. Some studies deal with gender differences in adolescents' emotional reactions to their first sexual intercourse. These studies have shown that adolescent women have generally viewed their first sexual intercourse experience with more ambivalence, describing it as less enjoyable than adolescent men (e.g., Darling, Davidson, & Passarello, 1992; Guggino & Ponzetti, 1997; Sprecher, Barbee, & Schwartz, 1995). For example, Guggino and Ponzetti (1997) found that at first intercourse, women experienced less pleasure, satisfaction, and excitement than men, and more sadness, guilt, nervousness, tension, embarrassment, and fear. Although no gender differences were found in feelings of romance, love, and exploitation, for women, feelings of romance, love, and pleasure go together, whereas for men, feelings of romance and love were separated from pleasure.

However, several major caveats emerge from these studies with respect to delineating gender differences in the experience of sexual intercourse. First, these researchers failed to include other relevant emotional reactions, such as disgust, entertainment, boredom, anger, curiosity, and depression, which were revealed in a previous study (Byrne, Fisher, Lamberth, & Mitchell, 1974). Moreover, they did not consider associated cognitive and motivational aspects of the sexual experience. Next, although the first sexual intercourse may influence subsequent sexual encounters, it may qualitatively differ from them. Men, as compared to women, are more likely to experience orgasm and physical gratification the first time they have intercourse due to physiological differences in the anatomy of the two sexes and men's greater previous noncoital sexual experience (DeLamater, 1987). Nevertheless, later sexual experience may minimize these differences (Darling et al., 1992). In addition, social sanctions concerning women sexual interactions may be stronger during adolescence, because they include ambivalent societal values regarding timing of sexual intercourse, which might lead to enhanced feelings of guilt and anxiety during the first sexual intercourse (Guggino and Ponzetti, 1997). Hence, one should be cautioned against over generalizing from these findings to gender differences in the sexual experience in adulthood.

Most studies that concern gender differences in sexual experiences in adulthood examine specific experiential aspects, such as particular behaviours, motives, desires, and emotions. Overall, their findings are rather in line with the predictions of sociobiology and …